source: bcymet

I wouldn’t consider ours a big family yet, but I know there are already people who look at us that way, and now that we’re expecting #4, we’ve definitely crossed that threshold for a lot of other people as well.

The most common thing people say to me, especially now as my pregnancy is becoming obvious, is “Oh, I could never handle four. I can hardly handle the [one or two] that I have.”

Here’s the thing, though: I don’t think your ability to handle one or two kids determines your ability to handle more.

A lot of large families will tell you that they got that way by adding one (or sometimes two) kids at a time…and they adjusted to their growing family little-by-little.

To be honest, I am a much better mother of three than I was as the mother of two and even more so than I was as a mother of one. Some of that may just have to do with age and experience, but I think most of it is simply because I have to be.

With each child we add to our family, I…

…become more disciplined…

…and less selfish.

I become more organized…

…and yet more laid back about things that don’t matter.

I treasure the little moments more…

…and realize the hard ones are just a blip in time.

I develop more routines…

…and become more intentional about carving out one-on-one time with our girls.

I think there’s a misconception that you either are or are not a good parent, and while there may be a few people for whom the whole shebang comes easily, I think reality is that most of us have to work at it. And that doesn’t make any of us less of a parent. I think putting the effort in to become a better parent is what really defines good parenting.

And I think God gives us children to mold us into the people He wants us to be.