Bethany, from The Land of Curly Hair, is one of my favorite Internet friends. I’ve known her for a couple of years now through an online homeschooling forum that we’re both part of, and I look forward to meeting her in person one day. She’s down-to-earth, straightforward and humble, and an incredibly fun mom to boot. Below she shares some thoughts about why we should pray for our children.

I had to laugh when Mandi asked me to write about praying for our kiddos. After all, it was just last week that I told Tim that I don’t pray for our kids as often as I should. And it was just this morning, an hour before reading Mandi’s e-mail, that I made a point to get up early, for the first time in a long time, to spend some time praying for our kids. So, I’m certainly not writing from the perspective of a mom who has it all together when it comes to praying for her kids. I’m just a mom who desires to do well at mothering, yet keeps things real when I blow it. I desire to spend regular time in prayer for our kids, yet I often fail to do so.

So, what’s the big deal about praying for our kids? What woman really needs one more thing to work on in her quest to be a good mom? Well, I can’t speak for everyone, but I’ll tell you why it matters to me.

1) I need wisdom. I have three kids. Their personalities are different. Their strengths are different. Their struggles are different. Yet, Tim and I have the responsibility of raising each of them to be adults who love Jesus, care for others, work hard, and choose wisely. While the goal for each child is the same, the training is going to vary from child to child.

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it”. Many parents read this as “lay down the law and impose your will while your kids are young, and you’re guaranteed to have kids who grow into adults just like you”. If you could pick up the BV (Bethany Version) of the Bible at your local bookstore, then that verse would read “Set biblical and practical goals in parenting, then develop an individualized training plan for each of your children that will help them reach those goals. If you train your children in an individualized way, then they’ll reach the biblical and practical goals you set for them”.

I realize this post is about prayer, not parenting styles. However, you can bet that if I’m supposed to come up with three variations on parenting, to take each child’s needs into consideration when training that child, then I’m going to need wisdom. Lots of it. And I know just where to get it. James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

2) I need a good attitude. In the busyness of life, the tackling of the “to do” list, and my desire to spend a day in bed with a stack of good books, it’s easy for me to start viewing the kids as a liability. They become a mouth to feed, a diaper to change, a kid to home school, a meltdown to deal with … interruptions to my day, to my desires, to my plans. They annoy me more quickly and things quickly go downhill.

Philippians 4:4-5 says, “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as Christ Jesus”. I’ve found that my attitude changes when I take the time to pray for them. The whiner becomes a kid who feels unheard. The bickering boys become kids who need lunch. The fit thrower becomes a kid who needs help dealing with frustration. The kid who keeps touching stuff they shouldn’t becomes one who needs someone to play with. Basically, they become real people with real needs, needs that I’m responsible for meeting, and cease to be an intrusion in my life.

3) It is effective. There are obviously a gazillion practical things we can do as parents, new tactics we can try, and advice we can listen to. Those things aren’t necessarily bad and can be very good. I just need to remember that God is bigger than any new discipline strategy or parenting style. He can change things when nothing else helps. He can change things before we even try to change them on our own. He can give us wisdom and discernment in knowing how to parent our children. James 5:16b says “The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective”. That alone could be the most important reason that I should be praying for my kids. I need to pray proactively, not reactively. Prayer can change them as kids and individuals. Prayer can change me as a mom and as an individual. Prayer can change the relationship we have with each other.

So, that’s why it’s important to me that I spend time praying for my kids. That’s why it’s something I need to be more diligent about. Whether I spend 20 minutes alone before everyone wakes in the morning or whisper a ten second prayer in a moment of chaos and emotion, I must talk with the Lord about my kids.

Stay tuned for Part II tomorrow morning as Bethany shares some ideas for what to pray for our kids!